Maybe it’s just me, but I think summer elevates everyone’s mood. Going outside is not a chore to prepare to do so. Clothing and shoes are easier to slip on and off and that alone is a mood changer.
Weatherwise, this summer has been different. It has been cooler than usual. I took a chance and planted my garden mid-May and as I watch my garden, I am not sure if planting it so early was the best thing to do as all my vegetable plants are not getting to any generous size. Every year I learn more about what to do and when. I gardened for years in the Twin Cities, and it is surely different 250 miles up here in the northland.
My parents were huge gardeners and as a youngster, I would see my parents sitting on a bench in the backyard just staring at their gardens. I never understood why, but as you age, you look at life differently and watching your garden grow brings peace, contentment, joy, and happiness.
I have always been aware of my surroundings and things catch my eye when I take walks or just sit for more than a minute or two. My inspiration for this column came during Memorial Day weekend during a walk with my son and family through Whiteside Park.
We passed one of the blue tables provided by the Ely Rotary near the playground equipment. As soon as I saw the artistic display that someone took the time to construct, it at once brought a smile to my face, and I pointed it out to my grandkids.
“Flowers” (dandelions) abundantly provided by Mother Nature were collected and their stems were pushed through the holes in the tabletop. The bright yellow flowers were strategically placed to create a message for passersby to take note and a nudge to incorporate the message into their day.
The message was a simple one with only two words, “BE HAPPY.” I snapped a photo with my phone and instantly filed it into my “Idea for an upcoming column,” brain file.
After I decided this column would be on the subject inspired by the photo I took in the park, I started to think about happiness. As I have gotten older, happiness does not always show up in my life as a smile on my face or a spring in my step.
Happiness has taken on a more subtle existence and is not as loud and dramatic as it was when I was a young woman. Happiness shows up when I open the blinds in my kitchen and feel that warm morning sun hit my face.
Happiness is not about having everything but realizing that small things around you mean everything. Being happy is not about having everything perfect rather enjoying the imperfect moments of life.
Happiness exists in choosing joy even in the face of indifference. Choices drive our moods and gratitude for what we have and allow us be hopeful for what is to come.
Happiness during sadness inspires us sometimes to stretch for a bone thrown by something as simple as passing a lemonade stand erected by some adorable neighborhood girls. Without any thought, I immediately pulled over and jumped out of my car so I could support these young entrepreneurs.
Their exuberance and smiles at once lifted my sad mood and pushed my sadness into the backseat as quickly as my decision to stop and support them. I asked them about the product they were selling and asked them how business was. They both yelled out in unison their sales for the day with smiles that I can still see. I bought a glass of their lemonade for $1 and gave them a $5 bill and told them the rest was a tip. They looked at each other with a silent “Wow.”
That short visit brought me so much joy and allowed me to steal a moment right under the nose of the sadness which was holding me captive.
I have been blessed to have had two of my grandkids on separate visits – each for four days in the past month. The joy and happiness they gave me each day we spent together was nothing short of wonderful. Having them one on one gave us the time and means to get to know each other and form bonds neither of us knew was possible.
I gave each of them a plain piece of paper and a writing utensil to make a list of what things they wanted to do while they were with me in Ely. My 9½ year old grandson’s list was quite extensive and I wondered if we would be able to make a dent in all that he jotted down.
I had a reason behind the list-making exercise. It was my hope to avoid hearing the words, “I’m bored,” from these youngster’s lips. I am happy to report it worked! After we returned from doing each item on their lists, they went right to the list sitting on the table to put a check mark next to the item that was carried out.
Each morning, we would look over the list to see what was left on it and they were allowed to select what we would do that day. If needed, we added an item or two. It was a fun way to let them lead their vacation time at Grandma’s.
We made visits to the Bear Center, The International Wolf Center, Dorothy Molter Museum, Ely-Winton Historical Society, Pioneer Underground Mine Museum, listened to the Bible in a Year, went kayaking and hiking just to name a few. The lists had the cemetery on them, which is not necessarily a fun thing to do, however, I needed to water flowerpots on four graves. These visits allowed time to tell my grandchildren a few stories and history about these great grandparents and relatives that they did not know about and are part of their heritage.
The difference between a girl and a boy were clear in the length of each of their lists. Louie is 9½ and Julia is 6¾. I am not sure if the age played a factor in the number of items or if the difference was because one is a boy and one is a girl. Boys tend to have to be kept busy while Julia was delighted to simply draw a picture or grab a Barbie doll. When I asked her if she wanted to add more things to her list, she said no, it was fine.
Louie and I went kayaking on the Blueberry River on a gorgeous mid-June afternoon. We were all by ourselves and the excursion was exquisite. We encountered no big wind, no bugs, and no humidity as we paddled our way down this new-to-me waterway at the end of One Pine Lake.
The simple beauty was breathtaking. Wild rice paddies and lily pads were abundantly growing in about every place we passed. We tried to go down a tributary but were stopped by a beaver dam. I never knew that lily pads come in assorted sizes and shapes – some looked like PacMan, some grew into heart shapes, and some were smaller in the shape of jellybeans.
Yellow flowers were blooming among the lily pads, and they were not easily plucked from the water as they almost felt like they were cemented to the bottom of the river floor. Their yellow color was stunning against the bright green lily pad they grew from or right next to.
I got an education via my eyes and ears as I heard the different birds, frogs, and crickets while I watched the water bugs slide through the glasslike surface in darting moves. Painted turtles sunning themselves on rocks would see us approaching and would slip into the water in complete silence. It was a relaxing afternoon that filled my senses, but most of all my heart. It was a simple time with my nine-year-old grandson that will forever be burned into my memory.
Time flies when you are having fun and when my time with them concluded, I was heartbroken it was over. I cried a lot of tears after dropping them off with their parents. Returning home was worse because the house was left void of their belongings and presence and the quietness was deafening. I was reminded that you should not be sad when something is over, rather be glad that it happened. I still cried more.
Sadness in life can be a constant, however, the moments with my grandkids reminded me that happiness does not erase sadness – rather both emotions can exist in my heart at the same time. There is room enough to handle them both. My heart is efficient enough to feel light even amid carrying something heavy.
I realized at that point that dual emotions allow one to embrace the delicate dance between joy and sorrow. That thought brought me back to when my father passed away and we were at Kerntz Funeral Home planning his funeral back in February 1999.
My brother and I made our way into the room that held the different caskets. Neither of us had ever been in a situation to really look at the different options of coffins/caskets as we walked around and started to read the individual cards that hung on them.
Who knew that caskets came with warranties? Waterproof and airproof? My question was, who is going to check? At that point, we started laughing uncontrollably. I, being one who always finds humor in any situation, was shocked that I was laughing at a time when sadness was supposed to be at the front of all our emotions. I can confirm it is true that laughter is the best medicine – even when it was at a time of intense sadness.
Life is better while laughing. Life will constantly mix it all up for us through no choice of our own and it will be that way ALL THE TIME. Finding our way to cope and shuffle through the difficulties have made many authors rich as they published self-help books on the subject.
There are various scriptures in the Bible suggesting that life is meant to be enjoyed, while also emphasizing gratitude and purpose. For example, in Ecclesiastes 3:12-3, it says, “I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink and find satisfaction in all their toil -- this is the gift of God.” Also, in 1 Timothy 6:17 it reads, “God richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment.”
Happiness is wonderful and sometimes there are days when it can be quite elusive. We all find our ways to cope, and I work through the rough times while constantly looking for inspiration and finding happiness in simple things.
So, I guess I will take the advice so freely offered on that picnic table in Whiteside Park and “Be Happy.” Even though it was offered to be merely a fun expression or suggestion, I know it can and is a wonderful place to exist and cherish. We all have heard a million times that life is to be very much enjoyed and not just endured. A “Be Happy” state of mind is without doubt the place for me. Join me, won’t you?
