A younger Point of View

by Willow Ohlhauser -

For most, the current season is spring. Pollen fills the air and your nose. However, for myself and many others, this season can be better classified as garage sale season! Neon stickers, balloons, and pockets weighed down by quarters is where it’s at!
Everyone is throwing open old closets and garage doors fly up. Dusty boxes tumble out and as you try to shove everything back in, an idea occurs; I have too much stuff.
Perhaps this is reiterated by a spouse speaking that very thought, telling you so kindly that it’s time to get rid of your baseball cards or time to downsize your collection of over 50 purses. Those cards will be worth something someday though so you better hang onto them. The purses, well you need one for every outfit.
I do think for a lot of people, becoming more aware of how much stuff you have is starting to become a little more obvious with all of the new buzz surrounding shows that focus on minimalism and only owning what brings you joy.
That’s great if you’re into that, props to you. But I think hoarders are a more relatable, realistic show for the general public.
So, with regards to garage sale season, here are a few stereotypes of different people that you most likely will see at any garage sale. In the chance that one of these hits a little too close to home, please, take no offense.
That one elderly person. If they happen to have a walker, watch out! They might just run you over when they see the holiday decorations. You thought that you were going to get that light up Santa? Think again. That Santa is theirs for the taking and they won’t let anyone or anything get in their way. Now THAT is dedication that deserves respect. After all, respect your elders.
No light up Santas at this sale? Well if you see a suspicious, Jenga looking stack of books and puzzles, that might be their stack. I would suggest not to touch it for fear that it is their stack and you get a very polite, “Hey, that’s my stack!” Fine, you can have your cat puzzles.
The reseller. This person has eBay pulled up on their phone and at the ready. They carefully inspect the date on everything to see if it is worth their 25¢. You would think that they’d be a good buyer given the amount of time they spend at the sale, but then they bring two items up to pay for. Either this sale had too many salt and pepper shakers for their taste (pun definitely intended) or eBay told them that everything was not worth, their quarter.
The piler. Now this person can be great if you’re the one having the sale. They’ll come in, and if you have cheap prices, they’ll buy everything. Close down the sale and have them back their trailer up.
But if you are at the sale you might as well leave. You go to touch something and just as you’re about to pick it up - “That’s mine.” they say quickly. Maybe you should just ask them what they haven’t bought or are planning to buy.
The kids selling lemonade. Sure it might taste like water. Maybe they used their hands to get the ice for your glass. But support the young entrepreneurs! They just want to make a couple bucks off you. The only good reason to walk by a lemonade stand is if you don’t have enough money. In this day and age, heck, they might even take Apple Pay.
The “normal” person. This might be you, but then maybe not. You might not fit any of these stereotypes and that’s cool, I’m all for that. But the “normal” person just shows up to the garage sale looking for a good deal. Maybe you’ll happen to find something that is of value, sell it, and be able to go out for some Chinese food. Maybe you just found a questionable couch on the side of the road that will be good as new with a few blankets and throw pillows on top. Let’s just hope that you’ll be the only thing living on it.