Letter from the hunting shack

Well, the last weekend of deer season has come and gone. Once again, you’ll have to wait until next week to see if I evened the score with Old Joey Bucksnort. The weather has surely been a factor this year, what with all this warm stuff and no snow. But hey, we do the best we can and put our time in. You just never know what may walk by when you least expect it. I was lucky enough to spend last Friday hunting with a couple of friends and although we didn’t see anything, I had a great day walking around in the woods. I walked through some territory that I hadn’t seen before and it was really neat to go exploring. It took me back to the days of my youth when I would strike out with my old single shot 410 and my trusty dog to fill my pack with squirrels for my Dad who loved to make a big pot of stew with those squirrels and all kinds of vegetables. Times have surely changed since I was a kid. I was only seven years old when I first started hunting by myself. The only gun safety course was the one passed down from father to son and my Dad made sure I was well trained before I was cut loose on my own. Without the comforts of Playstation and the Internet, I made the best of my free time by going hunting. More often than not, I was content just spending the day in the woods, looking for various signs of different animals and learning my way around. Of course, a few rabbits to cook for dinner were okay too. I can only hope that I can impart the same sense of respect and wonder for the woods to my own kids as my father did for me. I’ve written to you before about my fascination with the various gadgets and gimmicks used for deer hunting and this time I have a new one to report. This product is called Rutting Sticks. It is the newest thing in scent products. It’s an incense stick that smells like Bambi Sue. That’s right, a deer pee-scented stick that’s supposed to attract rutting bucks from all over. Well, me being me, I bought two packages of the things to see if they work. I tried one of them on opening morning and wouldn’t you know it, it smelled just like the bottle of Doe Drop In I normally use. The only problem was the wind would constantly shift and blow the smoke back into my stand and ultimately, my face. Ordinarily, this wouldn’t be much of a bother to me, but the previous night’s discussions about politics and the great Vikings defense had lasted a little longer than usual and my head and stomach were kind of queasy. Of course, I was getting queasier by the minute every time the wind blew Bambi Bladder # 5 in my face, but I was determined to see if Deerzilla was going to show. So like an idiot, I sat there, green faced and woozy until the stupid thing went out. Well, nothing happened except I now was well and truly ready to hurl and I smelled like the south end of a north bound skunk. Good thing I didn’t spew, because sure as Carter has liver pills, that’s when a monster would have walked by. Right when last night’s pork chops were hitting the ground. Speaking of food, I would like to share a recipe for turkey that I learned from a friend in South Carolina and since Thanksgiving is this Thursday, I thought it might come in handy.Patty’s Idiot Proof Baked TurkeyYou will need a roasting pan with a lid and a rack to keep the bird off the bottom. Make a rub with the following ingredients. 2 T poultry seasoning 2 T season salt 2 T garlic salt 2 T ground paprika 1 T black pepper 1 T onion powder Make sure your bird is cleaned and dried. Rub the thing with softened butter inside and out Add the rub to the bird liberally. Set your oven to its highest setting. Place the turkey on the rack in the pan and add two cups white wine and one cup water. Make sure the lid is on tight. Cook the turkey for one hour, then turn your oven off. Wait four hours and get ready to eat the best turkey ever. Take care, be safe and good hunting. Happy Thanksgiving!