Letters from the Hunting Shack

I was talking to a friend of mine who bow hunts. Of course our conversation naturally turned to the subject of big bucks, and the sort. He was able to tell me about the nice buck he shot last year and the year before. I, on the other hand began to tell him about the nice one I shot last when he interrupted me and said he’d heard this story before. Okay, how about the doe - he’d heard that one too. I just walked away, mumbling to my self. Then it dawned on me! The reason is simple why he’s heard my stories already, I haven’t got any new ones to share. I haven’t taken a deer in four years. Sure, I can tell you plenty of stories about the other guys’ deer but all I can muster about myself is a missed shot, and too many small does that I let walk away.It’s not that I don’t put in the effort mind you, I’m just on a bit of a dry spell right now. I’m confident that this year I will get a big buck. Naturally, I say the same thing every year because I like to keep a positive attitude about the whole thing. Never mind that all the guys in the shack have started calling me The Great Pumpkin. I can only guess the reason for that is that I’m big and orange and I just sit in one spot all day. Well I’m here to tell you all that The Great Pumpkin is going to silence all the naysayers and catcallers this year! I will be triumphant in my quest to bag a big buck.I gotta tell you, I’m getting a little nervous about the weather. It’s way too nice yet. I’m not complaining you see, I like wearing shorts and a t-shirt in October, but we have to get our conditions right for the first weekend of hunting. If we could get temps in the mid-20s for the high and about three inches of snow for tracking, all would be right with the world. The Weather Channel forecasted warmer than normal temperatures for this winter and we all know how accurate they are. I just hope I’m not swatting bugs in my stand.I saw a commercial on TV last week about a new product for deer hunting. It’s called Buck Bomb. It’s just like those bug bombs you set off in the house, only this bomb doesn’t kill bugs, it attracts deer. You know me, I’ll be having some of that to use this year, only knowing my luck I’ll accidently set the damn thing off in my stand and smell like you know what for the rest of the day. Imagine the indignity of The Great Pumpkin if he smelled like deer pee when he returned to the shack. There are worse things.This week I’m going to give you another good “use up the left overs recipe.” I know how it is when you hate to throw something out and then later you wind up doing just that because you couldn’t use it. I call this one my version of Zinkrofe.Use up whatever meat you have, pork, venison, ham, turkey, beef, whatever. Just make sure to use some Polish meat in the mix. If you’re at home, use your food processor or meat grinder. If you are going to the shack and have no power, grind up everything before you leave.Using a food processor or meat grinder, mix all your ingredients. Don’t forget to grind the Polish too. Add your favorite spices, salt, pepper etc. to taste.Use egg roll wrappers and add about 1/2 to 3/4 cup of the mixture to the wrapper, follow the instructions on how to wrap them up. Deep fry in 360 degree oil until good and brown, but not burnt. This way you know the meat inside is hot. Serve with some hot mustard and a side of sour peas. These aren’t quite as good as the ones you buy at the store, but they don’t suck either. Enjoy and good hunting.